Major Sins:

Believing the lies my parents told me about my potential, or lack thereof.

'You're nothing but a funny lookin' thicknut.'

I was supposedly s bad at 'cipherin' and almost failed Math 10 that I never wore a helmet for decades.

'You're a funny lookin' Ethiopian!'

I was white and skinny and stayed that way for quite some time.

'You'd make a wonderful scientist!'

I later blew up my chemistry set and burned the neighbour's field.

'You'd be a good fit for the clergy, son.'

Any bills that fell from the collection plate on my windy and fast paced way to the rectory became finders keepers.

'You could be the next Prime Minister of Canada! '

Helped me to become a natural born liar.

You're my little Tarzan!

Took this one to heart.

I had in fact built one of the best Tarzan swings in Nelson, BC. It was as dangerous as the cliff in 'Tarzan's Greatest Adventure'. I found I could not only avoid Simba and the Cannibals but also save my little sister, whom I named Cheetah, from the lava...most of the time.